With Christmas fast approaching, I wanted to gather up a quick list of swag that I think any CO would be proud to get or give as a gift. And Yes, with some of thee gifts you may, inadvertently, SHOOT YOUR EYE OUT!
- Duracoats “To Hell and Back” Distressing Kit
What shooter would not like the chance to pimp out his boom stick? Although I am not a fan of most of Duracoats pattern camo, I do like this one as you can do a Desert or Woodland, and best of all, it is all in a Spray Can. Total cost with the Sealer is around $100 from Duracoat.
2. Bulletproof Polo Shirt
If the acute fear of being assassinated on the golf course has kept you from swinging your 9-iron too many times to count, welcome to the start of the rest of your life. Breezy, bulletproof, and cleared for the country club, this polo shirt has a 100% cotton exterior, all-weather microfiber interior, and removable anti-ballistic panels in between. It comes in a variety of pretty colors, and three levels of protection: IIA, resistant to 9mm and Smith and Wesson FMJ ammo; II, suitable for fending off .357 Magnums, 38 Supers, and mini Uzi submachine guns; and IIIA, which is happy to give a big F-you to Uzi machine guns, MP5 and MP9 submachine guns, 44 Magnum SJHPs, and all knives. $3,475 from Fresh Polo’s (I know but it is a cool ass ideal!)
3. Gotcha Cap Self-Defense Tool
This thing was developed by an Israeli martial Artist..I’m sold!
You can watch the video to see the Gotcha Cap in action, or click here to watch a GIF of it showing a punk ass watermelon what’s up. Issued by FAB Defense, the Gotcha Cap is a covert self defense tool (and swell hat!) developed by Israeli martial arts expert Yaron Hanover and product designer Dov Ganchrow. It is rated “low profile” and “less lethal”, the former because it slides easily and unnoticeably into/out of a holster screwed to the underside of the cap’s bill, and the latter because it will presumably inflict pain and debilitate attackers without making you the guy who inadvertently put a Gotcha Cap in a dude’s ass when you were just trying to keep him from stealing your wallet. $39.20 from Amazon
4. The A-K Watch Band
Mark Greenman has seen the TIHK and raised it a ceramic razor blade, a 4′ Kevlar friction saw, and one trip to the lower hemisphere. In his own words: I designed the A-K Band because I plan on traveling to South America this summer, and like many white guys with a mediocre command of Spanish, I was worried about getting kidnapped.
The A-K, or Anti-Kidnapping Band is similar to a paracord survival bracelet, but with its Houdini escape and MacGyver resourceful tools built into a less suspicious watch band. Greenman foresees its low-profile installation on the wrists of military and foreign aid workers, journalists in conflict zones, and, of course, dudes in plaid shirts and Converse wandering around Bogota, Colombia asking, Donde esta la train station?
As demonstrated in detail on his Gearward Website, the A-K Band can help wearers maneuver out of handcuffs, rope, zip ties, and duct tape. Its tools’ placement inside a watch band is intended as a solution to being not just kidnapped, but kidnapped and naked. Or naked and not kidnapped, but handcuffed to a bed after the Brazilian human incarnation of Emma Frost apparently stole your money and passport. Good thing she didn’t take the watch. And good thing it was worth it–you’re pretty sure you got to second base before the drugs kicked in. A-K Band organization, which aims to preserve its wearer’s comfort and remain inconspicuous, places the razor blade in a pocket on the outside and the cuff key and friction saw against the wrist. $20 from Gearward.
5. Zombie Hammer Survival Tools
OK, I know these are a bit “over the top”, but hey, Christmas only comes once a year (at least that is my rationale).
“Zombie Hammer survival tools are designed to last longer than cockroaches.” Longer than cockroaches! Now that’s a sell. This knuckle dustered cache of apocalyptic weapons must have a collective immune system of steel! Hold on, let me…yep, verified! Steel! All Zombie Hammer survival tools are made of American steel. In America. By Americans. Zombies better check themselves, ’cause I’m about to wreck themselves. Hand me one of those bad boys.
So…let me get this straight: it’s one finger per hole on the grip, swing the pointy side, and don’t let let go? Right. OK.
$80 to $140 at Zombie Hammer.
6. The Hoo-Hoo Trip Mate Elite
- TRAVEL ROUTER: Instantly convert a wired network to wireless. Also can bridge an existing wireless network, create your own secure Wi-Fi network.
- ENDLESS STREAMING: Seamlessly stream your videos, photos, and music to your connected smartphones, TVs, media players, TV stick, and other DLNA devices.
- UPGRADED CORE: Faster and better with new chipset MTK7620, enables you to plug one USB hub attaching up to 4 USB hard drives or flash drives. And perfectly match the upgraded TripMate Plus mobile app.
- POWER BANK: Built-in 6000mAh power bank enables you charge most smartphones 2 times. And the 5V/2.1A USB port enables you to charge your iPad on the go.
- DUAL USB WALL CHARGER: Two USB ports enable you to charge two of your mobile devices simultaneously. Plugging the TripMate Elite directly to the wall outlet can easily recharge it.
Read the Review at Business Insider
Buy it at Amazon for $52.99
Stay Alert, Stay Armed and above all, Have a Merry Christmas while staying Dangerous!
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