{"id":33320,"date":"2020-03-27T12:56:38","date_gmt":"2020-03-27T17:56:38","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/hcsblogdotorg.wordpress.com\/?p=33320"},"modified":"2020-03-27T12:56:38","modified_gmt":"2020-03-27T17:56:38","slug":"an-old-pilots-wisdom-humor","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/thetacticalhermit.com\/index.php\/2020\/03\/27\/an-old-pilots-wisdom-humor\/","title":{"rendered":"An Old Pilot’s Wisdom (Humor)"},"content":{"rendered":"
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I think I might have screwed up. Several of us local retired pilots were asked to address a junior high gathering put on by the PTA.<\/h1>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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I was the only speaker to show up, so I had the stage to myself. I talked about staying in school, getting good grades and all that usual bullshit; and since I had plenty of time because those other guys didn’t show, I threw it open for questions.<\/h1>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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The last one asked was, “Can you give us a couple of your life’s philosophical beliefs?”<\/h1>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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I said, “That’s an easy one. Looking back over my lifetime, I’ve spent most of my money\u00a0 on guns, airplanes, fast cars, women and whiskey. The rest I just wasted.”<\/h1>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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I was escorted out without getting to finish my last two rules to live by:<\/h1>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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1) If it flies, floats, or screws, it’s cheaper to rent it.<\/h1>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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2) If it’s got tits or tires, you’re gonna have problems with it.<\/h1>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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I hope they invite me back next year so I can finish.\u00a0 They need to know this shit!<\/h1>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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I think I might have screwed up. Several of us local retired pilots were asked to address a junior high gathering put on by the PTA. I was the only speaker to show up, so I had the stage to myself. I talked about staying in school, getting good grades and all that usual bullshit;…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_is_tweetstorm":false,"jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false}}},"categories":[2382],"tags":[],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/thetacticalhermit.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/33320"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/thetacticalhermit.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/thetacticalhermit.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thetacticalhermit.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thetacticalhermit.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=33320"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/thetacticalhermit.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/33320\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/thetacticalhermit.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=33320"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thetacticalhermit.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=33320"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thetacticalhermit.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=33320"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}